Meal times with my family

I was born into a family of good cooks. Both of my parents were excellent cooks who could

make delicious meals out of whatever they could find in the fridge. Much to my dismay, I did not

inherit any of their skills with regard to cooking. I did however enjoy being the “consumer” of

their mouth-watering dishes.

When we were talking about food in class, I started to reminisce about what food I enjoyed

during my childhood. I believe that our taste and food preferences are definitely shaped by our

families of origin. When I look back and think about my family, I realize that we had so many

traditions that were centered around food. For example, when we were sick with a cold or fever

my mom would make soup called “sopas”. This soup is made of chicken, shell-shaped

macaroni, cabbage, and carrots. Now as an adult, I feel like my mom’s sopas was magical. It

never failed to make me feel better.

Then there was a tradition where my parents would make my favorite dinner the night before I

had an exam at school. They believed that a good meal before an exam could help my brain to

function better thus giving me a better chance of getting high marks. Birthday parties always

included spaghetti and pancit (Filipino version of pasta). My friends would always comment that

my mom’s spaghetti and pancit were the best! They might have expressed it in an exaggerated

fashion but I was always in agreement. They were really the best!

I always thought that my mom’s cooking was far better than restaurants. You cannot imagine

how much and how many varieties of foods we took with us when we visited the beach.People

would often say that a feast was not meant for the beach. Of course, my parents thought

otherwise.

When I spent my college years here in Tokyo, and went back home during school holidays, I

always gained weight. I didn’t even think about the reason behind it or care. It got me thinking

when my own children once told me, “Grandma and Grandpa always serve us food so we are

eating non-stop all day!” And then I reflected and asked myself the question “When did we not

eat when we were at my parents’ home?” The photos taken while we were vacationing

supported our thinking. We ate non-stop the whole day. What I discovered was that, after a

“main” meal (breakfast, lunch, and dinner), we moved from the dining table to the living room,

then to the small balcony. In each of these areas, food was served as if we hadn't had a meal

yet.

It would be an understatement when I say that I really loved and enjoyed all the meals that my

parents made for our family. Even while writing this article, I can still remember the taste and

what we were doing when we ate each dish. It stands out so vividly for me. Sometimes I wonder

whether the taste or the togetherness of being together as a whole family made a great impact

on my memories around our family’s food traditions. You see, my parents made sure that we

would always be complete for meal times; everyone was home.

In a generation where there were no mobile phones, we all made sure that we were home by

dinner time. Sometimes we had to wait for a sibling who was caught in a traffic jam, or take off

later than usual from school. Since we all knew that people would be waiting, we always tried to

be home on time. Meal times for us were always family times. I always enjoyed listening to my

older siblings’ funny impersonations of famous people and my dad’s cool jokes. I had such a

great time talking with my family at meal times. I never thought of counting calories while eating

with my family. All I thought about was all the laughter and giggles that surrounded our dinner

table. I loved eating with my family. Meal times were the highlight of my day when growing up..

Oh wait, even after I became a mom, meal times with my family back home always brought so

much happiness to me.

Well, for me what Eleanor Barnett, a food historian at Cambridge University said is true. She

said, “Eating together is a powerful means by which people solidify familial bonds, friendships,

and allegiances. So much so that the word, “companion” is derived from the Latin for “bread

sharer”: cum panis”.

Through our happy meal times, my bond with my parents and siblings has been strengthened.

Now that my parents are gone, there are times that I shed a tear when I eat a dish that they

used to cook for me. I remember them not because of the taste (because nothing comes close

to their prepared meals), but because of the memories of the conversations and jokes that we

shared while eating. Now that I am a mom myself, I try my best to make mealtimes a fun family

time. Although I am far from being a good cook, I got my dad’s sense of humor. I end up being

the “clown” and my husband being the cook which makes us a good team for a fun family

togetherness at mealtimes! I wish that my children will be able to say the same thing I feel

towards my family’s meal times.