Who do we live our lives for?
How do we know what people want to hear about? How do we know what people want to learn? How do we know what we should write about when tasked with doing so?
This is the dilemma that I was faced with when preparing to write this article.
My first thought was, when I look out there into the world, what is trending, that could be of interest to others? What if what is trending, is not something that I am interested in?
There has to be something that people are interested in that I am too, so what can it be? This brings me to the point “What is the purpose of me writing an article for Today We Dream?” Is the article for me? Is the article for others? And it all brings me back to how we live our lives. Do we live our lives for ourselves, or do we live our lives for others?
This is something that we can all have a different perspective of so I will just go ahead and share my thoughts which perhaps can be controversial or more importantly, stimulate further thinking from you, the reader.
When we think about who we are and how we lived our lives from when we were young up until now, I believe that we can all reflect on the stages that we have been through in order to get to this point. While I am a ripe 65’er, I believe that the above point is relevant to people much younger than I am, as well. So, when and where did we take responsibility for our actions, and when and where did we do something that others told us to do?
“Whose life is it anyway?” is the title of a movie that has a strong message about us being able to live our lives for ourselves. It focuses on a sculptor who becomes paralysed after a serious accident and wants to be able to choose when he dies, rather than live as an invalid.
Personally, I believe that when I was younger, I lived my life based on the guidelines and expectations of my parents, in particular, my mother. In my late teens, I found my own voice, which landed me in hot water, a lot. Despite the punishment and challenges that I faced trying to live my life for me, I pursued this. While it was not easy, I would not have had it any other way. To me, banging my own head against a wall was more important than not banging it at all.
I found strength through the adversity of living my life for me.
I found courage through the pain of living my life for me.
I ultimately found peace, through making the choices that allowed me to live my life for me.
I and only I, took responsibility for my life.
I made my own choices and decisions.
I continue to honour myself and live my life for me.
We only have this one time on earth so whose responsibility is it to make it the best life that we can live.
Only us.
Only you for yours and only me for mine.
Who would I have been had I followed my family’s requirements of me?
Who would I have been if I had allowed the notion of what is acceptable by society, to have controlled how I lived my life?
Who would I have been if I had not taken the opportunities presented to me, and lived them, no matter what?
Who would I have been, had I lived the illusion of others?
Life is a moment.
I believe in using the moments fully and instantly.
A moment is just one moment.
There will never be another same moment again.
As my best friend Jennifer/Zap said to me, after I visited her in Cape Town, South Africa, to say goodbye, just before she passed away: “Stop being so much in your head. Go into your heart and make decisions from there.” Therapy and amazing friends helped nurture my wounded soul, helped me through some truly sad losses. Each day I am grateful for my life. Each day, I am grateful for living it “My Way” as Frank Sinatra sang, in “I did it my way.”
My way is good for me, and your way is good for you.
Go with your gut feel when making difficult decisions and ask yourself this question: “How will I feel if I don’t?”
The answer is obvious.
This is an interesting article on this same subject.
https://www.lifehack.org/articles/communication/10-reasons-true-yourself.html
By Shelley Sacks on January 13, 2022
